I AM NOT ALEX CHAN

Recently at a basketball camp I ran in Hesperia, California I did a character lesson on identity which can be hard for a 10 year-old to understand. I handed out a brief discussion starter to every athlete which had a picture of me affixed to an identification card with the name Alex Chan. And so I asked the kids who was in the picture. Some said, “Duh, it’s Alex Chan.” while others said, “Is your real name Alex Chan.” Still others retorted, “You don’t look like an Alex Chan but you did go to Seaside University like it says on the card right?” Mad confusion began to materialize and I was quickly a fan of this. I cramped up from laughing so hard.

Ultimately, when I do this lesson, I always put minds at ease by revealing that I am neither Chan nor student of Seaside U. The lesson is simply about fake identities and why we acquire them. It’s one of my favorite discussions. Nevertheless, I’m amazed at the constant reminders of why and how we develop fraudulent views of ourselves.

Case-in-point: I played basketball yesterday with some guys I’ve known since the early 1990s. We all played basketball in high school but they were elites and I wasn’t. They were Pac-10 recruits and I was barely scouted in high school. I even told my wife that 16-17 years ago, some of these same guys would’ve laughed me out of the gym because I wasn’t IDENTIFIABLY elite in the world of prep basketball. But time goes on, everyone ages, some guys extend basketball into a professional career while others do not and here we are altogether on a Monday afternoon.

I realized that a part of you still wants the approval of peers. Nothing is at stake but pride is a juggernaut, completely capable of destroying the semblance of security one has in his or her true identity. There was still an air of hierarchy in that gym yesterday. Even the kids too young to play with us exhibited symptoms of awareness that not all ballers are created equally. They asked me, “Do you play professionally overseas?” I responded, “No, I’m done playing…just coaching.” That’s not definitive. The answer is simply, NO. But identity is the outcome of hard fought internal conflict in which truth is often the most costly casualty.

So as I played and enjoyed the mix of veterans and young guys headed overseas for their first professional contract I was glad that I knew I belonged in the gym. I’m not there because I am ex-pro. I’m there because I am a resource to the world like the guys who started the Homeless World Cup eight years ago. People are leaving destructive lifestyles riddled with drug and violence simply by playing soccer. Somebody who loves the world’s most popular sport decided to channel the love, harness it and be professional in the realm for the sake of others.

The Grit & the Glory: Homeless World Cup 2009 from Buzz Films on Vimeo.

It was insightful. Every time I’m in a gym, I see myself as that guy professionally integrating basketball and virtue, basketball and philanthropy, basketball and ministry, etc…I see that now but it was hard to accept at 16, 21 or 23 years old. Maybe truly meaningful living is linked to knowing one’s own IDENTITY. I reckon if God wanted you to have someone else’s fingerprints, he would’ve given them to you.