If you’re having a casual conversation that could stand some kick, ask the person on the other side of the table if they trust in anything and why. Count 1-alligator, 2-alligator, 3-alligator as you await the response. You’ll probably find it a provocative query especially if you ask people between the ages of 16-21 years.

As a basketball player I sold short the importance of trust in a team or group construct; I never thought about it. But as a coach it’s become clear that teens to young adults are not confident in the consistency of life, people or even themselves. And I wish I could vouch for the incredulity of the suspicous climate in which we live but I can’t. I understand why young people doubt so much, trust so little. A shot in the dark says these young people are no different than you and I in that they’ve trusted before and that’s why they don’t now.

Frequent and abrupt change is one of the most feared aspects of life. Friends in the National Basketball Association (NBA) have talked of the difficulty of a late night trade that sends you 3,000 miles to a new team where you’re expected to perform at a high level despite undergoing the jarring of an environment switch. Young people will reference divorce in essays and fault themselves for the what they perceive as a catastrophe. If the world of 2009 differs drastically from previous periods in history, I wonder if the difference rests in the fact that the world is becoming a perpetual state of flux, continuous change.

Imagine a world with no constants. What if routes you take to work changed daily, law enforcement occurred sporadically if at all or schools were closed randomly throughout the year. Trust is certainly a hinge without which life cannot move freely and normally. Trust erodes easily but the positive I’ve seen is that people still value it. Where there’s trust there’s a sense of community, interdependence and the basic teamwork needed for humanity to flourish. The rub is that students and athletes with whom I’ve spoken want to know who or what they can and should trust. Let’s be prepared to answer them.

One week ago a dear friend and his beautiful wife gave birth to their third child but after a series of tragic events and complications, my friend’s wife passed away last Sunday. I was leaving an event with my wife when I was notified of the news and it dealt a blow I’ve not felt in some time. The most difficult dynamic to stomach for me was the movement from elation to despair if the latter is even an accurate term to describe my friend’s series of emotions.

It hasn’t fully set-in if ever it will but it has led me to revisit both the biblical account of Job specifically and the overall value of a story and its truth to humanity. So often when I write these posts the perceptions of others course through my mind and try as I might I’m positive the that these thoughts affect and maybe even temper the message. In other words, if I think people won’t be comfortable with my vernacular I tend to shy away or over analyze what I’ve written. Why is this relevant to my friend’s story of losing is dear wife?

Because this is a post I don’t want to be superficial. It’s relevant because He and his family’s story has been one of the greatest testaments to the power of faith in Jesus Christ that I’ve ever seen. I could almost see, in my own mind’s eye, my buddy’s trembling fingers mustering strength to update his Facebook status and keep all of us aware of his wife’s condition. As the the events accelerated I was reminded of the story of Job, an ancient Near Eastern biblical book of wisdom in which an extremely devout man is requested by Satan to be afflicted. A conversation ensues between Satan and God after which Satan is allowed to conditionally attack Job by stripping him of wealth, health and family. Job is blindsided by the cataclysm. But he doesn’t curse God which is clearly the objective of Satan.

In Christianity, despite thousands of denominational/theological differences, there is generally a common belief that God is full of mercy and grace to be distributed based on need. I’ve read Job more times than I remember and as he was restored I have seen my friend and his three kids moving in a strength that is unparalleled and due wholly to the mercy of God. I value the Job account more now than ever because as God was faithful in the biblical book, I see him doing exactly the same thing for my friend. There is value in the story in more ways than can be recounted. I like to avoid pain and suffering but life’s realities force us to both confront it and submit ourselves to God for the sake of survival. More and more I appreciate the stories that anchor my faith because if I pay attention I can see their value played out in my reality and that of others close to me. It is the hope of the story that convinced me not to join gangs or quit basketball all those years ago. And it is still The Story that strengthens my weak knees and makes straight paths for my feet. My friend, his wife and their kids are all my inspiration because they are and were people who valued the stories that undergird my faith. They have become one of those stories and I challenge anyone to say otherwise.

I’ve never gotten my head around the seasons in the world of sports and how they flow from one to the next. Football looms as baseball fades. Hockey and basketball will coincide soon enough and overseas, undoubtedly there’s respective times for Soccer, Rugby and Cricket. If the metaphor is accurate, I’ve come to believe that life too has seasons, although not nearly as predictable.

The changes from one season to the next can be dynamically jarring or stimulating and the ignition voluntary or involuntary. One constant, however, is that seasons will never cease to move us toward change. As an avid basketball enthusiast, off-season has always interested me as I watch, read and listen to stories about the behavior of players who aren’t in the thick of competition. How are they preparing? How’s the rehabilitation? Are they shooting a movie instead of putting up a thousand shots a day? Is the athlete addicted to destructive behavior (i.e. promiscuity, narcotics, illicit business practices, etc…)?

I ask the questions and watch behavior because I know that you, the pros and myself all have in common that seasons are inevitable, forcing us to face new realities. For the exceptional, I’ve seen guys like Dikembe Mutombo (Center-Houston Rockets) develop himself through philanthropy which literally means “love of people”. Using $15 million of his own money and raising donations to build a hospital in his hometown, the Congolese capital of KinShasa, Mutombo has prepared himself for the unavoidable, post-basketball phase of his life. Online sources say that the idea to build a modern hospital in the Congo was conceived more than 10 years prior to its ultimate completion. Surely people suffered during the season when quality medical care was unavailable in that region but the season that has followed is bringing new hope to thousands .

Whatever season you’re in takes courage, resolve and foresight – all things that are core character elements. I’ve seen and am seeing how the persistent commitment to developing who you are is the ONLY preparation for a season yet undefined. When the details of future events evade our awareness, and they always do, you have but one recourse. Commit to developing a spiritual core that will allow you to compete with the threatening conditions of the season. The sun shines today but there’s a Sunday game in Green Bay in sub-zero temperatures.

People say sometimes, “How do you seem so calm with all this going on?” Take a close look at anyone and you’ll see that they’re troubled from time-to-time but seeking truth is the basis of preparedness in a world that never calls timeouts. And spiritual truth is what offers hope. At least it has for me. No tricks. Just truth. Seek it before, during and after any season in which you find yourself. If you’re lost, you should probably start asking questions.

…it can feel really foreign to you.

Most if not all team sports have positions and usually the combination of size, strength, speed and skill set determine which one you play. In college I played a position commonly known as the Power Forward or “The Four”. I was undersized for the position as I am undersized for most everything but the coach taught me footwork, angular technique for generating strength and how to facilitate an offense from the post.

Learning how to play inside with the “bruisers” was like learning to ride a bike the first time. Recently having to play the inside positions, however, has been like pumpin’ up the bike tires after four summers of watching the paint on the frame fade. Mentally, I knew where I was supposed to be and which moves would be effective but I couldn’t get my body to do them at game speed. The moves were no longer instinctive and were sloppily executed due to unfamiliarity.

While the brain is unparalleled in its ability to store information, the greater mystery could be determining how much work it takes to reacquaint yourself with something you once did at an expert level. Translating biblical Greek/Hebrew, dunking a basketball, writing for an audience and giving an oral presentation were once all in my repertoire but it’s the repetitive use of those skills that allows me the command I desire. I can assure you that I do not do all of the things in that list at mastery level anymore. You can never assume that because you learned it once  it need not be revisited. That is the mistake of the arrogant and presumably it’s why mediocre legends can make lots of money based on past greatness. People tend to remember you the way they last saw you which works in your favor if you were exceptional once-upon-a-time. Just remember; performance TODAY depends on preparation even if you’ve done it before.

My wife shared this idea with me that one of our friends shared with her and it may very well be the key to reprogramming the musings of the mind. I asked a group of students recently, with eyes closed for anonymity, to raise their hands if they felt that they were NOT intelligent. I was alarmed at the number of kids ages 13-15 who had already decided to accept the label “STUPID”. I got to thinking that there was something wrong with my students, with me and altogether with our culture.

Affirmation is a fundamental need though perhaps not as pressing as the requirements of food, water and shelter. Or is it? The Daily Affirmation is kind of like an intrapersonal detox. And now this blog post is officially sounding mystical and self-helpish. At any rate, my wife gave me three sentence frames that read like so:

I’m prone to feel __________________________________________.

But your Word says _______________________________________.

So today I choose to believe __________________________________.

I’m supposed to fill in the blanks and write this affirmation everywhere – on index cards, as a reminder in my phone, mirror, etc. For 3-6 weeks or at least 21 days I’m to affirm myself seven times a day. And why not? Do you know what I say to myself everyday? The self-mutilating utterances go, “I’m no good a that,” “That’s alright, I don’t need that (when I really do),” or “I could never see my business flourishing and working globally for people’s personal transformation.” Please believe that if you don’t provide an antidote to the poison you administer daily, you can predict your own outcome can’t you?

So since we all do better with examples, here’s what my daily affirmation looks like:

I’m prone to feel incompetent and immune to prosperity.

But your Word says that if I am free from the love of money, the generous man will be enriched.

So today I choose to believe that I will make my living developing the character of athletes and others because that’s what I’m here to do.

Man it’s hard being transparent. Tag you’re it.

I lack tenacity but I’m aware of it now. What is this quality we use to define the most determined people? It’s like the relentlessness, the fortitude, the rapacious resolve to complete that operates outside of logic and common sense. People used to say I didn’t have common sense but actually I may have had too much of it like you. Too much common sense, I’m finding, renders the enterprising spirit impotent.

I grew up going to church like millions of other African-American kids with southern family roots and money was a peculiarly faceted subject that we usually avoided. It was that thing you needed but couldn’t be tenacious about and that’s where I learned to lack tenacity. I know how to compete athletically but when it came to the filthy lucre, that’s exactly how I saw it…as filthy and criminal. I still hear the voices, “Don’t let that money change you,” or “Don’t forget where you came from.” Have you seen where I come from? Who can forget that.

I bought lies about money fostered by a number of societal culprits that it would be counterproductive to name exclusively. But what I will say is that I’ve learned that I need a volatile fuel if I am to acquire and maintain tenacity when it comes to offering what I have to the world for the price that it’s worth. As much as poverty sours in my mouth, the taste is no match for the insecurities associated with money’s mythical ability to change me. I feared money, what it would do to me and the consequences of becoming its slave.

But today the fear is revisited and I’m more and more convinced that tenacity is not an option. For me it means turning my company into a lucrative endeavor that will support family and help build the resources that give people a chance to discover truth, namely athletes. I’m ashamed that I’ve not been committed to this in past years but nothing stimulates tenacity like the disappointment you feel when it’s both necessary and found lacking.