Either/or questions are the best in the nebulous world. I asked the high schoolers I was training yesterday the following question: “Should the dude who skips off-season workouts, excuse HIMSELF from the team.” There was hesitation and then about an 80-20 split. The hesitation must have been due to a grim realization that, “I may be that guy” or that “That guy or girl might be someone I consider a friend. I wouldn’t eliminate my friend from the team…would I?” I could see the teen-aged loyalty beginning to ooze. But these kids have known me for a while now and they know I’m after the SOLUTION. The solution to what? The solution to losing and ill preparedness.

I told those athletes that I’d ask a teammate to quit if he/she did not want to prepare. In fact, the youngest girl in the workout said, “Why would they want to be on the team if they weren’t willing to practice? What a waste of time.” This, from a girl who could barely walk and chew gum last fall but worked hard to be an impact player on her Freshman team last season. But those young people know the intoxicating value of the limelight, that kids will seek it while not being willing to pay for it.

See, I often like polarity and the notion of putting your teammate on the spot. Be the JERK. Can you be the JERK? In the same vein, can you eliminate yourself…be the JERK in the mirror, give yourself an ultimatum? If you want to be successful, you’ll need to have this power in your arsenal. Preparedness is 90% of a disaster, or so I’ve heard, meaning there’s more in your control right now related to what you will do or what will happen to you six months from now.

“BE PREPAAAAAAAAAAARED” – Uncle Scar, The Lion King 1995

The world is officially a strange place but only if we buy what’s being sold by the opportunists we hear, read and watch.When you have a chance, listen to the radio talk show hosts who squeeze in ads during the broadcast trying to convince you that this ticket broker or that energy drink will “do the trick”. No wonder we’re so skeptical. The strangeness of the world is due to something as old as humans themselves – LYING.

My wife and I were talking about how tabloids malign celebrities like Mariah Carey for gaining too much weight then deride Nicole Kidman for being too thin. Surely the writers, those “gators”, couldn’t be genuinely interested in generating a grassroots movement bent on restoring the said icon to healthy living. No, it’s much more pedestrian than that. It’s just about selling magazines or whatever the tangible product may be. The headline, story and picture will draw your attention while you’re in the Express Lane at Vons. And this is not to fault the opportunist for he/she is only a fallible human. Seriously. If I’ve learned anything it’s to hate the game more than the player of it if I must hate anything. In other words, I’m not so concerned with media telling young girls that they need to be a size -1 to be attractive. I’m more concerned with getting the truth into the young girls so they have what it takes to resist such nonsense. Learn what the truth looks like and you won’t even bat an eye at a counterfeit.

Playoff hockey is like playoff anything else except way more physical. Sportscenter showed a hit on a Boston Bruins center David Krejci by Philadelphia Flyers Captain Mike Richards which landed Krejci in the hospital with a dislocated wrist. The season just ended for Krejci not long after Bruins Forward Marco Sturm tore his ACL and MCL in his right knee. The Bruins are up in the series, however, though their projections of winning the Stanley Cup are not favorable given the key injuries.

Aggression has an unmistakably pernicious connotation. It’s a bad word, almost profane and little boys are reared one of two ways: Either play the role of the quintessential bully or ebb at even keel. The bully becomes a societal menace if some demi-bully doesn’t teach him a lesson and Mr. “Even Keel” usually realizes one day that he is a soft, complacent individual who has let life HAPPEN to him. So maybe somewhere between the ferocious Mike Richards who ended Krejci season and the dutiful non-risk-taking person there’s a proper use of aggression.

I thought about my own history of aggression or the lack thereof and found that I missed out on tons of things because I didn’t ask outright, left a voicemail message instead of stopping by in person, sent an email to do a phone call’s job, gave a person a reason to say NO to my product because it sounded like I didn’t really believe in it. Aggression, as with anything, has merit in moderation. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I’m going to need $50,000 to get this project done ma man.” A lot is read and left between the lines when it comes to communicating. And yet, some of the most successful people have figured out that it isn’t offensive to ask, to query, to offer, etc.

The people who most resemble me in this world fear rejection, an inanimate and unavoidable truth of day-to-day grindin’. It is true that you have to find out what you really want out of this world and pursue it. It goes without saying that you must know why you want it and that it ought not be superficial. Nevertheless, proper aggression is the way to contend with what afflicts people from your neighbors to villains operating child trafficking rings world wide. The guy who broke Krejci’s wrist actually set up the opposing team for the winning goal. That’s bad aggression. The Bruins remained on the attack using what advantages they still had. The Lakers are doing the same thing exploiting their size advantage against the Utah Jazz. On a personal note, I had to stop saying that my words didn’t matter and accept that if I have one gift, it’s that when I speak, people listen and hear my heart. I’m a lodestone. What’s your claim to aggressive fame?