CONFRONTATION

by

Posted:

People subscribe to mantras and quote pithy sayings by which to live. I’m no different.

Joshua 1:9

Amplified Bible (AMP)

9Have not I commanded you? Be strong, vigorous, and very courageous. Be not afraid, neither be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Where I grew up, confrontation was a constant whether it was verbal or potentially physical. I remember being afraid to fight and yet thinking that fighting was normative. What an oxymoron. In the case of the quotation I use as a banner, the recipient of the information being spoken is Joshua, son of Nun. He is situated for confrontation, even destined for it. The rub is that his mentor Moses is dead. And this in and of itself is a confrontation with many truths. Imagine following a leader whom you trusted, a leader who knew how to protect droves of people, a leader whom you were comfortable serving only to have him die and hear the words, “arise and take his place…”

In the 1980s, I feared fighting because I feared pain. But it’s more likely that the real fear was of having to live differently after combat. With victory comes a new set of rules by which to live. With valiant defeat comes the same set of rules. It could be that we fear the transition brought about through confrontation because it compels us to think differently. Change is uncomfortable for us all but mentoring is pointless if it doesn’t lead the mentee or protege into significant confrontation. I’m not sure if I ever thought of myself as a Joshua but I’m certain we have his same impetus. His life belonged to a purpose bigger than himself and his ability to remember that truth made confrontation far less of a bully. The tough conversation, the willingness to correct others who hurt the team and today’s nemeses are all trumped by a greater allegiance you have but just haven’t acknowledged. Watch what happens to fear of confrontation when you remember why it is you go to war in the first place. God speed.

INSIDE OUT

by

Posted:

Inside out is hard. Ask a running back. They get paid to follow large men into confusion and escape unscathed. While offensive lineman protect their respective play callers from annihilation, running backs make a living penetrating the human mine field that is a defensive scheme. It’s all in a day’s work too…to move the chains or scoot for 30+ yards en route to “the house (a touchdown).” Inside-out is hard on many levels.

And I can tell because writing about real, transparent life gets heavy…so heavy that one can experience writer’s block. And truth told, life is never short of things blog worthy but inside-out is exhausting. The question is whether you can muster the audacity to remain authentic. When what’s going on in your life is suddenly  displayed it should be comfortable but we all know it isn’t. Inside out usually occurs via scandalous revelation through gossip. TMZ  or forced confessions.

I sat in a room recently with some co-workers and we labored through an affirmation exercise that took literally hours. Do you know how hard it is to sit through 15 people telling you what they see in you? It was hard because the infinitely varied perspectives, all accurate, show you things you didn’t want to believe about yourself. You are so used to stewing in society’s juices of slander, ridicule and back handed praise. The guarded individual is what we become whether we like it or night. This is why we don’t share life willingly and wobble when others genuinely esteem us. To share who I really am means I become vulnerable. It’s Jimmy “B-Rabbit” Smith all over again beating the opposition to the punch by citing his own faults before someone else can. But who wants to admit they’re a loser in any respect? So we don’t live inside-out.

Then again, when people beat us to the punch with adoration and accolades seeing the best in us despite the worst we see continually in the mirror, we again resist inside-out. So imagine, we neither share our faults nor our strengths with the people we do life with everyday. What kind of lives are those? Among people constantly but trapped inside some crazy isolated bubble. Inside-out life is fun. Is not TMI or a case of bleeding all over people. It’s just life lived in real time as real events unfold. If the champions of isolation and compartmentalization were honest they would say, “I just don’t want to spend my energy thinking about other people’s crap.” In a word, maybe it’s our SELFISHNESS that keeps us from inside-out life. If I don’t share and don’t receive, no one else will and I can continue with my agenda. Not only is that boring. It’s lame.

SHREWD SURVIVAL

by

Posted:

Kevin Durant, James Harden and Brandon Jennings are among many NBA Stars darkening the gym doorways of renowned street ball and summer league locations nationwide. Durant just dropped 66 at the Rucker while Harden gets buckets at the Drew League here in Los Angeles. The pros have commenced to puttin’ in work this summer – the type that gets tweeted and retweeted until the venues have to limit capacity.

But aside from the clear separation between average and super, the pros are demonstrating an ancient life skill of survivability. Many of even the richest hoopers have  taken to less conventional form of work atypical for this time of year. Normally, right about now is the tune up that leads to training camp in September but for guys like the aforementioned, this is a time to court overseas playing options so that killing time during a lockout doesn’t mean financial idleness. For other players such as Zach Randolph or the Clippers’ Al-Farouq Aminu, they heeded the advice given to them and divided their bimonthly paychecks so that they’ll keep coming through November 2012 whether owners and players see eye-to-eye or not.

There’s a bible story about a shrewd man who found himself suddenly on the brink of unemployment (Luke 16:1-8) but wisely thought of a way to use his skills to prepare for the worst. His called the “shrewd manager” and his ability to ward off hunger is commended. These NBA guys are savvy in the same regard, convincing the world that they have value even if the NBA were to cease to exist. When FIBA (Fédération Internationale de Basketball) agreed to allow NBA players to participate in their leagues during the lockout and return to the NBA when it ends, players began playing a game that most of us are afraid to play –  the one where you market your most noticeable skills to viable clients. It’s more a paradigm than a game and it is simply the entrepreneurial mindset.

Have you ever talked to a professional athlete? They’re not interested in working for a direct report. They’d also rather not have their schedules made for them. The only reason the NBA gets away with that is because its employees really really like bouncing a ball. Oh and the pay is six digits minimum on the left side of the decimal point. These modern survivalist are exhausting themselves to keep the money flowing. Some of them are desperate because of an extravagant lifestyle as indicated by cases-in-point like Antoine Walker and Derek Coleman, to former NBA stars who made more than $80 milliion during their careers but are now experienced in bankruptcy. Other players are just serious when it comes to financial security and they’ll not be outdone by circumstances.

It makes me wonder how shrewd I am? Resourcefulness is a learned trait whose growth is stimulated through an understanding that, “I must have something somebody needs, a solution I can offer to somebody’s problem…” Make no mistake about it. When the fans at Rucker Park in New York were chest bumpin’ Kevin Durant after he drained five straight three-pointers and he tweeted about how much fun it was, it was still business.

JUMPED-TO-START

by

Posted:

I got jumped three times yesterday. The first time was right outside my house and the second and third occurred in Riverside. On all three occasions, I was just minding my own business when the calamity struck. I was just trying to get from point A to point B. But you never can tell when the culprits of a bad day will rear their ugly heads. Fast forward to the day’s end and I can tell you all’s well that ends well because I saved a grip of money installing a new battery into my car myself.

So in case you were thinking I had been beaten up by a bunch of thugs, I didn’t mean that kind of “jumped”. I’m talking about the jumper cable, red and black, positive/negative sort. My car had that smoker’s cough wheeze going when I tried to start it that morning. And then wheezing turned to the annoying clicks stifling all hopes of the engine turning over. So I ruminated about the appointments I’d miss if I went straight to the mechanic. I felt harried and pressed to make a decision about what was the greater priority – fixing my car or training the athletes who were expecting me. I quickly figured that a jump start would get me to the first appointment and a second to the next appointment. I knew I could spiderman my way to the afternoon slingin’ jumper cables instead of webs. To me, there was no sense in panicking about a stupid battery, if that’s all that was wrong with my car.

I chose right too. And I couldn’t help but wonder, “How often does the daily mishap become an emergency?” When things don’t go as planned, it can become all you think about thus consuming the best energy you have to give. My objectives on Friday morning include providing quality personal training for my clients and only true emergencies should trump those commitments. I guess it’s a lesson in mental toughness when the things you expect to go right go wrong. Will you deliver “the goods” despite the impositions? Will you blame yourself in advance for what stands to go undone if you use the jump-start as your excuse?

GENIUSES

by

Posted:

I’ve had a problem with my MacBook’s email client for at least two months but did nothing about it. All I needed to do was march my lazy self to the “Genius Bar” at my neighborhood Mac Store and wait a few minutes for help that likely would take a nano-percentage of my life. But the reluctance, the complacency, the “put-up-with-this-ness” of my character. I marvel at how someone who claims to be solutions oriented tends to procrastinate.

Len Bias, a fallen star whose message still lives on 25 years later.

The question is whether or not this is a common malady – the notion of people not listening to sound advice let alone seeking it. Am I alone in my contentedness that sometimes allows me to go months without changing simply because it’s easier to stay the same? For a more somber reference, let’s shift attention to the National Basketball Association past for today’s lesson. ESPN’s 30 for 30 featured a great piece on the late Len Bias, the Maryland basketball star who died due to cocaine induced cardiac arrest the day after the Boston Celtics drafted him in 1986. Bias’ skill, athleticism and dominance made him a virtual lock to change the course of basketball lore a la Mike Jordan. But Bias, like so many other athletes since, ignored the “geniuses,” at least at one crucial moment. The geniuses were easily his parents. But on the morning he died, he wasn’t with geniuses. Quite the contrary.

When a friend of mine who directs basketball camps showed the 30 for 30 clip to campers, they seemed dumbfounded. Footage of a man who played 25 years ago still impressed young aspiring athletes. The power, ferocity and precision of Bias’ game reminded me of the timelessness of a perfected craft. And yet also timeless is the foolish deference a person can make to unwise people and activities. Maybe a genius is merely someone who not only knows what you do not but they are willing to share such insights with you. And upon discovery of the genius you say, “Brilliant! Thanks man.” But what follows the epiphany is the harder step. After discovery comes the willingness stage in which you have to commit to the habit of seeking knowledge and acting upon it. Habits are synonymous with defaults and when your defaults are quality…you are quality.

When I watched the 30 for 30 piece on Len Bias, I couldn’t believe cocaine had killed him. I forgot how cocaine and crack’s advent set the inner cities of America aflame in the 1980s. I forgot about the dope dealers with the hydraulic truck beds bouncin’ to beat “outta dem sub woofers.” I had forgotten how easily I could have ben Len Bias minus the geniuses who overrode my indiscretions prior to high school and gave me the third degree about my “associates” and their habits. 30 for 30 brought it all back to me and while I was thinking,  “What was he thinking?” I realized you could insert the naive factor in the place of cocaine. We’ve all been Len Bias; we just haven’t all overdosed to the point of seizures and cardiac arrest. The name of the drug doesn’t matter. Bottom line is that when your dream beckons, your vocation, your calling…you can best believe something in the non-genius category will present itself as a worthy alternative. The hope is that when those moments or that moment arrives, you will have the habit of seeking wisdom as a shield.

20 Out in the open wisdom calls aloud,
she raises her voice in the public square;
21 on top of the wall[d] she cries out,
at the city gate she makes her speech:

22 “How long will you who are simple love your simple ways?
How long will mockers delight in mockery
and fools hate knowledge?
23 Repent at my rebuke!
Then I will pour out my thoughts to you,
I will make known to you my teachings.

Proverbs 1:20-23

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica

UN-LOCKED OUT

by

Posted:

It’s possible to think, feel and live outside of an NBA Lockout that on the surface appears to limit what a player can do to prepare for the upcoming season. Darren Collison is a prime example. It’s like he’s the NBA version of the NFL’s Larry Fitzgerald who trains vigorously as if all is right and on schedule. Just as education can never be taken from a man’s mind, the heart and will to prepare cannot be stifled unless you allow a “Lockout” to become a justification for complacency. How easy it would be to say that a stalemate of business proportion necessitates a cessation in commitment to one’s craft. That would be like saying that because of a hurricane, a flood or a fire that guts your home arena you have a right to assume working can wait. But the truth is, it can’t. Working can never wait because potential is a mystery and character can always stand refining.

A lockout is a test of resolve, an affront to your sense of adaptability. Will you be enterprising when the top-notch facilities or your favorite physical therapist is unavailable? Will you find the resources, the competition, the time in the day away from the distractions, etc. to propel you forward so that when it’s time to be ready you won’t have to get ready? A professional like Collison stays sharp because he’s grateful, competitive and UN-LOCKED out in his spirit. Basketball to him includes his camp he runs in August and his livelihood. It’s bigger than revenue sharing if anything can eclipse money. Perhaps the key is to avoid over consumption with the threat of a pay cut. It’s the pure motivation that keeps a man or woman un-locked out when the owners and players aren’t seeing eye-to-eye. It’s remembering that if given the choice of playing professional basketball or teaching English for the same amount of money that you would still take basketball. For as long as the dream job is available to NBA standout Darren Collison who started 79 games this past season and helped the Indiana Pacers to the playoffs, you invest in it. You do this by investing in others and yourself, by redeeming the time as they say at NBC Camps and understanding the value of 86,400 seconds in your day. There is no lockout for a person who lives on purpose. Just ask Kobe who recently underwent knee surgery…again to ensure he’s prepared. Follow Greg Oden around, a guy who’s poised to take another stab at launching an injury ridden career. And let’s not forget the man/myth that is Blake Griffin. In Blake’s mind, he was cheated his rookie year by his knee and won’t be outdone simply because there might be less games this season. Do you have what it takes to be un-locked out?

CALCULATING

by

Posted:

So much planning is done without counsel and so much planning isn’t done at all. You are now tuned in to two lockouts, one in the NFL and the other in the NBA. Summer time and the living is easy for pro basketball gods because, from what I’m told, they get paid biweekly during the regular season and those checks they get every two weeks are pretty substantial. There are many sides to the calculating life of professional athletes.

Take into consideration this one. Greg Oden, the number 1 overall draft pick by the Portland Trailblazers who was selected above superstar Kevin Durant who is absolutely assailing would-be defenders and destroying barriers for young burgeoning players. Oden has played something on the order of 82 games since his draft date due to an unfortunate series of injuries which have plagued him. He is now poised for free agency with no body of work to speak on his behalf. And while Portland vows to stand by their man and match any offers made for his services by other teams, Oden does well to calculate his options should he find himself unemployed.

But how do you do that? Or has he done that amidst the hope of vanquishing the knee demons that rear their heads every time he sets foot on the court? Calculation requires one of the most unique skills available to human kind – FORESIGHT. It is the ability to not only see looming possibilities (no matter how negative) but also embrace the reality associated with them. For Oden, it might mean understanding that your identity as a basketball player is in jeopardy. It might also mean that calculations need to be made about education, business preparedness and preserving existing wealth. For Greg Oden, at only 23 years old, he’s on the cusp of life and demise and calculation will be difficult because of the voices. These are likely the same voices that convinced him to leave Ohio State University after just one year to jump to the NBA. Oden has never seen a challenge like the one he will face in the next several months but a genuine submission to truth is all that is needed to allow divine wisdom to flood his decision making. All joking aside, let’s hope he acquires seasoned wisdom to go along with his seasoned facial features.